The Pub
by Elky.And.The.Rupert.Obsession
Summary: The Harry Potter people go to my fictional Pub and catch up with there lives. Very Funny if you have a sense of Humor.
1. Draco I mean Draca!

**Ok I attempted to make a serious story where Harry and Co. where like 25ish I guess and they all went to some bar place to catch up on stuff because they were busy and stuff. Ron was an auror, (sp?) and Hermione was a professor, and Harry was the pres. of the Order. (even though Voldemort is dead, yeah know for no more crazy dudes.) But it was crap, so I decided to make a parody of that story, and no you wont be able to look at the original story because its actually this document written over lol.**

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Hermione and Ron are at the Pub catching up and talking about there lives.

Hermione was a super model that goes by Frizzy.

Ron was a janitor.

Harry, well they weren't sure because they haven't talked in a while, last they saw was that he invested all his money in some "sophisticated" magazine called Playwitch. (I know not so original)

As they were talking they heard the door open and some guy with brown hair, unusual scar on his forehead, and two girls on each side of him.

Hermione- Harry?

Ron- Woah get me one Harry. **staring at the girls **

Harry- Yes its me Hermione, and No Ron you said this magazine would never work.

Ron- Wahhh

Hermione- So how's the magazine doing?

Harry- GREAT! I have three "Witches" living with me and we get it on every night!

Hermione- I asked about the magazine not your sex life.

Harry- Oh.. well the magazines doing well, hey I need some models for the magazine **winks at Hermione**

Ron- NO MY WIFE WILL NOT POSE FOR YOUR MAGAZINE NAKED!

Hermione- Ron I'm not your wife..

Ron- no I was talking about my wife Draca! (This is NOT a spelling mistake)

Harry- Ron I don't put men in this magazine.

Hermione- and since when were you married to Draco?

Ron- Bloody hell no I would NEVER marry Draco. I married Draca!

Draco.. I mean Draca- **walks in** Hey honey bunches **goes over and kisses Ron on forehead**

Ron- hey sweety come sit on my lap!

Draco.. I mean Draca **sits on Rons lap**

Hermione- Uhm Ron that's Draco with a wig and dress on.

Draco.. I mean Draca- HOW DID YOU KNOW YOU SMELLY, ICKY, FRIZZY HAIRED MUGGLE!

Ron- That explains the stick down there!

Harry- Idiot.

Ron- Why did u do that!

Draco (who we all know was Draca)- Because I lovveeddd you!!!

Ron- Oh I love you too! Draco! Even if u are male!

Ron and Draca, I mean Draco ran out the pub into a random field of daisys and sunflowers!

Harry- that was weird.

Hermione- Verryy weird.

Harry- So.. me and my play mates are off to do important stuff. (not meant to be sexual in anyway for those sick minded people like me)

Hermione- ok I have to go too to pose for the front cover of life & style magazine anyway.

Harry- Well here's my card incase you change your mind. ;)

Hermione- that won't be happening for a while.

Harry- **ignores** **walks out of pub with girls on each side**

Hermione- Ok.. **Walks out too**

--2 minutes later—

Neville- **walks in pub** aww man I'm late AGAIN

--The End—

**Hope you liked! Review **


	2. Emo!

**Chapter 2 of The Pub!**

**Ahh forgot to put this on the last chapter: I OWN THE PUB! But not the characters.**

**This time it's the other characters that aren't as important!**

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Luna, Emo Ginny, Fred & George, Cho, and Dudley (yes he's going to the pub) Featuring GRAWP!

They are all sitting at a table that had to be extended because of our favorite pig Dudley!

Fred- Hey Gin, how's life treating you?

Emo Ginny- My life sucks because Harry left me.

Cho- Wahhh Cedric.

Luna- its alright I can talk to dead people.

Cho- WHAT IS HE SAYING?!?!?!?!

Luna- He says your ugly now

Cho- BUT I LOVE YOU CEDRIC!

Luna- your voice put him to sleep.

George and Fred and Emo Ginny- hokayy

Dudley- WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE!

Emo Ginny- Harry I miss you!

Dudley- Oh get over it, I think he's gay anyway.

George- so anyway the point of this story is to catch us up with each other so the Joke Shop is doing well.

Dudley- I KNOW WHERE IVE SEEN YOU TWO BEFORE YOU GAVE THE THAT CANDY THAT MADE MY TOUNGE ALL BIG!!!

Fred & George- Oh yeah! That's nothing we have better ones now ::Give Dudley a toffee::

Dudley- No I won't fall for that again!

F&G- Darn.

Emo Ginny- HARRY!!

Cho- CEDRIC!!

Emo Ginny and Cho- ::Crys on eachothers shoulder::

Luna- they are weird.

Fred- you shouldn't be talking.

George- Yeah Loony.

Luna- ::crys and joins Emo Ginny and Cho::

F&G- Noooo! we turned someone else emo!

Dudley- OMG I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE! Ginny Harry's stupid and gay. Luna you are weird! Cho, Cedric is gone and thinks your ugly move on! Fred and George you guys should just kill yourselves if u make people emo! (The author doesn't agree with last comment Dudley made)

All of them are emo now.

Than they hear a loud stomp outside.

All- what is that?

Grawp- ::Walks in Pub::

Grawp- ::Sees Dudley:: MY BROTHER!!!

Dudley- AHHHHHH ::runs away::

Grawp- BUT I LOVE YOU BROTHER::Grabs Dudley and gives him a hug::

Dudley- ::Dies Instantly because the hug is to tight:: (he deserved it)

Everyone who became emo because of Dudley's Words became un-emo, who was only Fred and George.

F&G- that was interesting, well were off, bye all!

Luna- Yea me too, I want to talk to Dumbledore some more.

Cho- Cedric I will see you soon ::Jumps of table:: WAHH IT DIDN'T WORK ::Runs outside to street and now waits for the Night bus to hit her::

Ginny- you know what Dudley was right! Harry is gay, because I mean look who he left ::points to herself:: I'm going to find someone else, STARTING NOW ::walks out of out of pub to find her soul mate::

Two Minutes later!

Neville- ::walks in:: hey where is everyone ::sees Dudley's dead Body:: AHHHHHHH

THE END!

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**Reviews would be nice!**

**Now that this story isn't a one shot anymore I was thinking that the next chapter will have the dead people talking to each other at the pub. (Cedric, Sirius, Dumbledore, Lily, James, and Voldemort (Ok remember this is a few years after school and Harrys alive so that means Voldemort is dead!) and MAYBE Cho if the night bus gets her and people want her back.**


End file.
